The Tape

01 · THE HONEST STANDINGSThree teams at 5–2. Pat has a win.

Record next to all-play (your record against every team, every week) and the median record (did you beat half the league). Luck is real wins minus the wins your scores earned. Lucky and Robbed are flagged at a full win either way.

Alex lost to Ernie by 41.80, the biggest margin of the week, and his lead is gone. Michael and Ernie are 5–2 with him. Alex is 42–21 on all-play. Brent is 4–3 and 44–19 on all-play, now the best all-play in the league. Brent also has the most points for, 1025.32. Ernie and Michael have each won four straight. Ernie is 6–1 against the median. Michael is 3–4 against the median and is 5–2 anyway. Natchez is 4–3 on a 20–43 all-play, with +1.78 luck, the most in the league.

Pat beat Logan by 14.04 for his first win of the season. He is 1–6. Logan is 3–4 on a 17–46 all-play, the worst all-play in the league. Jerome is 1–6 on a 30–33 all-play, and his luck is −2.33, the lowest in the league. Pat has faced 1006.44 points, the most in the league and more than any team has scored except Brent. Natchez has faced the fewest, 826.36.

02 · THE MEDIANJerome was robbed for the third time. Michael stole another.

Jerome’s standing request since Week 5. The median is the middle of the ten scores — the average of the fifth and sixth. Robbed = beat the median and lost. Stole = missed the median and won. Every prior week is re-pulled from Yahoo before this page is written.

Re-checked against Yahoo on October 26. All sixty team scores for Weeks 1–6 were re-pulled player by player and matched the files exactly: no stat corrections this week. Every median above is the average of the two bold scores.

This week’s middle two were Logan’s 125.06 and Louis’s 127.90. Logan missed by 1.42 and lost. Logan is 1–6 against the median.

Jerome scored 135.62, beat the median by 9.14, and lost to Brent, who had the highest score of the week. Jerome is the only manager robbed three times. Nobody else has been robbed more than once.

Michael scored 118.44, under the median, and beat Natchez by 3.46. That is Michael’s second steal. Michael has scored under 120 twice this season, 118.60 and 118.44, both in the last two weeks. He won both games. Natchez set a perfect lineup and lost the closest game of the week. Pat beat the median for the second time this season, and this time it came with a win. The league now has six robberies and six steals.

03 · WEEK OVER WEEKBrent climbed five places to first. Alex slid eight, to last.

Every score of the season, the weekly scoring rank, and the move from Week 6 to Week 7 only.

Brent scored 148.70, 28.02 more than in Week 6, and went from sixth in the weekly ranking to first. Jerome had the biggest gain, 35.76, from 99.86 to 135.62. It was not enough. Pat’s 139.10 is the most he has scored in any week this season.

Alex went from second to tenth. Before this week he had not scored under 114.46 all season. His 101.62 was 30.42 under his Week 6 and 46.97 under what his own starters were projected for at kickoff — the biggest miss of the week. Jalen Coker scored 1.90 at receiver, Eddy Pineiro 1.50 and the 49ers defense 0.50. Louis slid four places, from first to fifth, and still beat Andrew.

04 · THE COACHING TAXMichael left the most and won anyway

Points left on the bench: your optimal lineup minus what you actually started.

Michael left 31.10, the most in the league this week, and still beat Natchez by 3.46. Three swaps account for all of it. Cam Skattebo scored 23.60 on his bench while Chase Brown started and scored 11.30. Devaughn Vele scored 16.40 on the bench while Garrett Wilson started and scored 4.60. Dallas Goedert scored 9.80 on the bench while Sam LaPorta started and scored 2.80. His best lineup was 149.54.

Logan left 28.32. Joe Burrow scored 29.38 on his bench while Jordan Love started and scored 17.96. Blake Corum scored 20.10 on the bench while Isaiah Likely scored 3.20 at flex. His best lineup was 153.38. Pat scored 139.10.

Natchez set the only perfect lineup of the week. Pat left 0.42: Tyler Shough outscored Kyler Murray by exactly that. Jerome left 4.20 — Carnell Tate for Germie Bernard — and his best lineup, 139.82, still trailed Brent’s 148.70.

Losses your own bench would have won: your best possible lineup that week beat what your opponent actually scored. Opponents held fixed.

Logan’s bench would have won three of his four losses — Weeks 4, 5 and 7. Jerome’s bench would have won four of his six losses. This week was not one of them. Both of Michael’s losses were bench losses. With his best lineup every week, Michael would have won all seven.

Season to date, Logan has left the most on his bench, 169.68, and Andrew the least, 51.66.

05 · THE FIRST TRADEClosed: Louis by 22.10

Every trade this season, logged from Yahoo’s transaction page. Each side is scored on everything its players score from the week the trade took effect — started, benched, or dropped. Points scored while a player is on nobody’s roster come from Yahoo’s weekly player page and are marked FA.

Metcalf scored 9.60 for Louis this week, at receiver, in a win. Henderson scored 4.30 and was still unclaimed when Week 7 ended. Since the trade, Metcalf has 35.70 and Henderson 13.60: Louis by 22.10. No trades were made this week. The thread retires with this edition; the ledger stays on the page.

06 · WEEK 7 PERFORMANCESThe best of it

Every starter and bench player on a league roster, ranked.

Tony Pollard scored 39.50 for Louis, the top score of the week. Tee Higgins scored 30.80 for Pat in his first win. One of the ten sat on a bench: Joe Burrow’s 29.38, for Logan, who lost.

07 · LEADERSBy request: Jerome’s top ten at every position, Week 7

Every position, this week and the season, straight out of Yahoo under our scoring. Tap a position to open it. Red means nobody in this league owns him. Ties share a rank. Yahoo had not yet booked Monday night (Dallas at Philadelphia) into its season totals when this was pulled, so those players’ Week 7 points are added from the weekly page.

26 of the 62 weekly rows belong to nobody, down from 31 of sixty in Week 6. 7 of the twelve kickers tied into the top ten are on waivers, and 5 of the top ten tight ends. KC Concepcion Jr., dropped by Jerome on October 21, scored 23.70 on waivers. Season to date, 7 of sixty are unowned, all of them kickers and defenses.

The bye holes in Section 08 line up with the wire. As of Monday night, the top quarterback of Week 7, Bo Nix (29.78), was on waivers. So were the top defense, the Buccaneers (27.00, and 74.00 for the season), and the top kicker, Cairo Santos (15.00). Denver, Tampa Bay and Chicago all play in Week 8.

08 · WEEK 8Eight teams are starting someone with no game

Yahoo’s projections for lineups as they stood Monday night, before waivers. A starting line, not a forecast.

Jerome vs Natchez. Jerome has no kicker with a game: Ka’imi Fairbairn is on bye and there is no other on his roster. Natchez is starting Christian Kirk on bye; his best lineup is 129.28 with Parker Washington and Stefon Diggs in.

Pat vs Louis. Pat is starting Alvin Kamara on bye with James Cook on his bench; his best is 124.25. Louis is starting Nico Collins and Dalton Schultz on bye, with Josh Allen on his bench; his best lineup is 123.15.

Michael vs Andrew. Michael is starting Christian McCaffrey and Chris Olave, both on bye; his best is 115.39. Andrew is starting Breece Hall, listed Out; without him his best is 124.09.

Logan vs Ernie. Logan’s best is 121.26 with Joe Burrow and Saquon Barkley in. Ernie is starting C.J. Stroud on bye; he dropped Jayden Daniels for him on October 22, and his only other quarterback is Lamar Jackson, listed Out.

Brent vs Alex. Brent is starting the Texans on bye and has no other defense; his best is 131.65. Alex has his kicker and defense on bye, both 49ers; his best is 121.39.

Houston, San Francisco and New Orleans are on bye. All five games are first meetings this season. Last week’s five calls went 2 for 5, and one of the five favorites had flipped by kickoff. Logan was the projected favorite by 8.49 and lost by 14.04. Alex was projected to win by 30.22. Ernie won by 41.80.

09 · PREVIOUSLY ON EPSOFFThe season so far, one thread at a time

Every thread carries the week it opened. A thread settled, confirmed or reversed for two straight weeks retires to the closed arcs.

Closed arcs

Logan versus the median (Wk5–Wk7) Opened as “he has never beaten it.” He beat it once, in Week 6, and missed by 1.42 in Week 7. The first trade (Wk5–Wk7) Metcalf 35.70, Henderson 13.60. Louis by 22.10. Andrew is the best manager in this league (Wk3–Wk6) Reversed in Week 5 and stayed reversed. Can anyone beat Alex? (Wk1–Wk5) Natchez did in Week 4. Buffalo is carrying Louis (Wk1–Wk5) Reversed in Week 3 and stayed reversed.

One opened, two closed, and one reversed. Pat’s first win came against the man writing this.

10 · WHAT TO WATCHThree open questions

The things Week 8 actually settles.

Last week’s three, answered. Nobody traded. Pat won. And Jerome’s best lineup, 139.82, would still have lost to Brent’s 148.70: this time it was the opponent, not the bench.

Who leaves the tie at 5–2? Andrew projects 135.02, but that counts Breece Hall, listed Out; his best without Hall is 124.09. Michael projects 102.28, with Christian McCaffrey and Chris Olave on bye. Ernie is starting C.J. Stroud on bye and has no other healthy quarterback. Alex draws Brent.

Is Pat for real? He projects 106.04 against Louis, who projects 93.20 — with Josh Allen on his bench.

Does Jerome’s kicker cost him? Jerome and Natchez project 0.66 apart, and Jerome has no kicker with a game.